I'm not quite sure how to feel about it. On the one hand a have a fairly large portfolio to put together before the spring, on the other I have Sean and Karlie. The two people who have stuck by me always and who I am going to miss dearly once college starts. I have time, but not much, not enough. Lila is so young...so much changes in just a year at that age and I'm afraid I'm going to miss it. My worst fear is one day I'm going to come home from school and she won't remember who I am because I've been gone for so long. I know that it's my life and I need to live it, but if I could keep everyone I love with me for the ride that would be even better...and since I am considering a school in Georgia that might not be possible.
I need to do research in the next few months about careers. I've been interested in architecture lately, and I'm hoping that's not just because of 500 Days of Summer...(Tangent warning) It seems like a lot of things I accidently take from things I've seen or read about. Example: Drawing. Read a book about a girl who was an artist right before I started doing it. I was so jealous that she could paint all these beautiful landscapes and draw these portraits, even if it was just a book! Other things like that happen...(Tangent over)
I'm also interested in animation (because a girl in my class mentioned that's what she wanted to do and I thought it was an awesome idea), graphic design (because mr. bardos was talking about a blockhead who went on to college to be a graphic designer and now he's doing really well in it). See? I mean I guess some of it's inspiration, but I kinda wish I knew what was right for me, and not just take what is right for other people.
I do know one thing. I need to create. That's what I do. Even when I was writing (I still am, just without the idea of becoming a writer) or making music, it was the process of creation that i was drawn to. Being able to say something is entirely your own...it's liberating.
